Weeds In Your Family? The Weeds Aren’t the Problem
What weeds are growing in your family garden? Weeds don’t grow out of nowhere. They grow when the roots need care. In my work with families, I often see the same pattern: what we call “the problem”-the eating disorder, the anxiety, the anger, the constant pressure is really just a symptom. It’s the weed that shows something deeper is happening below the surface.Eating disorders, disordered eating, body image struggles these are just some of the weeds that can grow when stress, fear, or pain take root. But they’re not the whole story. They’re the result. The (negative) coping tools that sprout when we’re doing our best to survive something hard.
Nourishing the Roots Instead of Fighting the Weeds
In my books, Redefining Success and This Stops Now, I invite families to stop fighting the weeds and start nourishing the roots. When we tend to what’s underneath—our emotional health, our connections, and our sense of worth—we begin to see real change. The roots strengthen, the soil heals, and the weeds no longer take over.
By focusing on the three key pillars—Family, Flow, and Fit—we reconnect with our values, recognize individual strengths, and honor natural interests. This focus helps us tune out the noise of social media and society’s definition of success. When family values, flow (what your child truly loves), and fit all align, our children thrive. Strong roots allow them to blossom into their personal best.
This approach nurtures resilience and well-being while reducing the “weeds” — the stress, pressure, and mental health struggles that are all too common for today’s teens.
Weeds in Your Family?
Whatever your weeds are, whether they’re eating disorders, substance abuse, self-harm, a generational pattern, or another mental health condition these books help you look in the mirror, identify what weed is growing, and learn how to nourish the roots instead of just pulling at the weeds. When we learn new coping tools, (positive coping skills) to get us through the hard times, like mindset shifts, healthy communication, emotional regulation, self-compassion, we don’t just survive stress: we transform through it.
Healing Begins with a Shift in Perspective
Healing begins when we stop asking, “How do I fix this?” and start asking, “What can heal this feeling?”
That small shift changes everything.
When we approach our children—or ourselves—from a mindset of fixing, we tend to focus on what’s visible: the behavior, the outburst, the attitude. But when we shift toward healing, we start to ask a different question: What’s underneath this? Because behavior is communication—it’s how unmet needs, unspoken emotions, and unhealed pain show up when words fall short.
When we pause long enough to look beneath the surface, we can start to understand what the roots are trying to tell us—even if it shows up through the weeds. A meltdown might be a cry for safety. Withdrawal might be a quiet plea for connection. Defiance might be fear wearing armor.
Our job isn’t to pull every weed. It’s to tend the soil—to create safety, empathy, and understanding. And that begins with focusing on what’s right in front of us: seeing our loved ones fully, roots, blooms, and weeds included.
When we return to what I call the basics—Family, Flow, and Fit—we build the kind of environment where healing and growth naturally happen.
- Family reminds us to stay grounded in our values and connection.
- Flow invites us to notice what comes easily—what lights our child up.
- Fit helps us align routines, relationships, and expectations so that everyone can grow in balance.
Together, these create a foundation where our children can blossom into their authentic personal best—not society’s version, and not even our own idea of what that should look like, but truly theirs.
That’s where healing begins—in the pause, the presence, the listening, and the gentle response.
A New Way Forward for Families
If you’re ready to move FORWARD – with more peace, understanding, and resilience – start with Chapter 1 from each book. They are free. Because healing begins when you nourish the roots. Take a look at the summary of each.
Parenting today often feels like a high-speed treadmill of pressure, comparison, and never-ending “shoulds.” We push harder, sign up for more, and strive for perfection—only to end up disconnected, exhausted, and wondering if this is really what our kids need.
Stop Fighting the Weeds: Nourish the Roots with These Books
This Stops Now Shattering The Pattern of Perfection, Pressure and Parenting on Overdrive offers a new way forward. Drawing from years of research, real family stories, and practical tools, Siah Fried helps parents step off the hamster wheel of overdrive and into a healthier model of success—one that prioritizes values over validation, connection over competition, and resilience over perfection.
This is not a parenting book about doing more. It’s about looking in the mirror and recognizing what needs to be fixed for your family, creating space for growth, and building a home where both parents and kids can thrive.It’s time to stop the cycle. It’s time to choose connection. This Stops Now.
Download Chapter 1 Free: This Stops Now
Success isn’t one-size-fits-all.
In today’s culture, achievement is often defined by a narrow checklist—high grades, athletic accolades, scholarships, and a stacked résumé. Parents and children alike scramble to keep up, yet many are left feeling inadequate when they fall short of this impossible standard. The result? Rising rates of anxiety, depression, eating disorders, and burnout—amplified by social media’s constant reinforcement of an unachievable “ideal.”
But what if success looked different? What if it were defined not by external measures, but by each child’s unique values, strengths, and passions?
In Redefining Success for Every Child: The Family, Flow & Fit Approach to Achieving Personal Best, health educator and parenting coach Siah Fried offers a compassionate, research-based framework that helps parents step away from comparison culture and guide their children toward authentic fulfillment. Drawing on psychology, education, and real family stories, Fried introduces the Family, Flow & Fit model, designed to help families:
- Break free from society’s one-size-fits-all definition of achievement
- Encourage purpose-driven growth by aligning challenges with strengths and passions
- Promote healthy rigor by finding the fine line between a gentle push to succeed (and even fail) without an unhealthy shove into distress
- Foster resilience and well-being while protecting against low self-esteem, anxiety, and disordered eating
- Celebrate personal bests—being your best at what fits you, not the best at everything that doesn’t
With relatable stories, actionable strategies, and insights from leading research, this book empowers parents to nurture confidence, creativity, and balance in their children.
Whether you’re expecting your first child (yes, I coach expectant parents on this) parenting a preschooler, student-athlete, or college-bound teen, Redefining Success for Every Child will help you raise kids who thrive—not by chasing society’s checklist, but by discovering and living their personal best.
Download Chapter 1 Free: Redefining Success for Every Child
Every family garden has weeds—that’s normal, because none of us are perfect. Growth and flourishing happen when we notice the weeds and tend to them. In my own family, the weeds showed up as eating disorders, which is why I specialize in helping parents identify, prevent, and get the right support.
Nourishing the roots works for all kinds of challenges, not just the obvious ones. In my Move FORWARD parent coaching program, we identify the weeds, care for the roots, and put coping tools in place so your family can move from feeling messy and untended to thriving and connected. Find out more about my Move FORWARD program here.
You don’t have to do it alone—every garden blooms when it’s cared for. Use this link to schedule a complimentary coaching session and start helping your family flourish today.