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Author name: siah_fried@yahoo.com

coaching with Siah Fried, experienced parent and health coach
care team, disordered eating vs eating disorders, eating disorder coaching, body dysmorphia coaching, diet culture and disordered eating, signs of disordered eating, mental health coaching, supportive care team, Uncategorized

Don’t Do It Alone: How to Organize A Supportive Care Team

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Don’t Do It Alone: How To Organize A Supportive Care Team: When your child is struggling with their mental or physical health—whether it’s anxiety, disordered eating, a chronic condition, or something you can’t quite name yet—it can feel overwhelming, isolating, and even paralyzing. As parents, we often feel like we should have all the answers, or that it’s our job to “fix” it on our own. But the truth is: you don’t have to go it alone. In fact, organizing a care team is one of the most powerful things you can do for your child—and for yourself. A well-rounded support system helps you move from confusion and worry to clarity and connection. It allows your child to be seen as a whole person, and not just a diagnosis or a set of symptoms. Here’s how to begin building that team—one that supports your values and your child’s unique needs. Step 1. Organize A Care Team: Start with Your Core Values Before you bring in outside professionals, get clear on your family’s core values. What matters most to you when it comes to your child’s well-being? Maybe it’s compassion over compliance, trust over control, or collaboration over quick fixes. When you lead with your values, you’ll be able to filter advice, treatment plans, and communication through a lens that feels aligned—and avoid second-guessing yourself at every turn. 🟢 Tip: Write down 3 guiding values for your parenting approach. Use them as a compass when making care decisions. Step 2. Organize A Supportive Care Team: Identify the Gaps Next, take an honest look at where your child needs support. These are some common care categories to consider: You don’t need to fill every role right away. Start with the most urgent needs and go from there. Step 3. Organize A Supportive Care Team: Choose Aligned Professionals Not all providers are created equal—and not every well-meaning expert will be the right fit for your family. Seek out professionals who: 🟢 Look for specialists who use a collaborative, trauma-informed, or HAES® (Health at Every Size) approach if disordered eating is a concern. Step 4. Organize A Supportive Care Team: Connect the Dots Once your team is in place, your role becomes one of care coordinator and advocate. That might mean: You are the common thread. And that role is powerful. Step 5. Organize A Supportive Care Team: Take Care of You, Too You can’t pour from an empty cup. As your child receives support, you also need space to process, plan, and rest. A parent coach, therapist, or support group can help you hold the emotional weight without burning out. And remember: you’re not failing because you need help—you’re showing strength by building a village. Final Thoughts Organizing a supportive care team doesn’t mean giving up control—it means stepping into your role as a connected, empowered parent. Your child deserves a full-circle approach to health, and you deserve support in making that happen. You’re not in this alone. And you don’t have to act like you are. Use this link to schedule a free call now. 💌 Want more support? Download my free guide:“4 Steps To Talk To Your Kids About Food-Without Making It Worse” — a roadmap to help you organize your next steps with clarity and confidence. And join my newsletter for weekly insights, scripts, and support for parents navigating food, body image, and emotional wellness. Get the Free GuideJoin the Newsletter

Find out the difference between disordered eating and eating disorders: what parents need to know
body image, disordered eating, disordered eating vs eating disorders, disordered eating vs eating disorders, eating disorder coaching, body dysmorphia coaching, diet culture and disordered eating, signs of disordered eating, mental health coaching, eating disorder, Uncategorized

Disordered Eating or an Eating Disorder? What Parents Need to Know Now

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Disordered eating or an eating disorder? What parents need to know now. Eating disorders have nearly doubled globally, rising from 3.5% to 7.8% between 2000 and 2018. Every 52 minutes, someone loses their life due to an eating disorder. But here’s what many parents don’t know:Less than 6% of those with eating disorders are medically underweight. That means your child doesn’t have to “look sick” to be struggling. 💬 “Is this just picky eating? A phase? Or something more serious?” If you’ve asked yourself this, you’re not alone. I’ve worked with countless families asking the same questions. And here’s what I always say: You don’t need a diagnosis to take action. If something feels off, trust your gut. Disordered Eating vs. Eating Disorders: What’s the Difference? Both disordered eating and eating disorders affect how someone relates to food, but they’re not the same. 👉 Disordered Eating Includes behaviors that might not meet the criteria for a diagnosis—but are still harmful.Examples: 👉 Eating Disorders Are serious mental health conditions like anorexia, bulimia, or binge eating disorder.They require medical and psychological intervention. Both deserve attention, can cause harm and can people can heal with the right support Disordered Eating or Eating Disorder? The Numbers That Matter So let’s bust the myth that only “thin” kids are at risk—and start listening for the quieter signs. Disordered Eating or Eating Disorder? What You Can Do If your child is… …it’s time to take the next step. You don’t have to wait for a formal diagnosis.There is support-just reach out. Let’s Talk. As a coach trained in disordered eating recovery, intuitive eating, and body image work, I help families understand what’s going on—and what to do next. ➡️ Contact me here or DM me on Instagram @siahfriedcoachLet’s make sure your child gets the support they need—before things escalate. Warmly, SiahSiah S. Fried, MPH, NBC-HWCwww.siahfriedcoach.com Here is a link for more information on the statistics listed in this blog.

What I Learned About Why Kids Cheat
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What I Learned About Why Kids Cheat: How to Help Ease The Stress & Pressure

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By Siah S. Fried, MPH, NBC-HWC What I Learned About Why Kids Cheat: The Meeting That Changed Everything What I learned about why kids cheat: How to Help Ease The Stress & Pressure. Twelve years ago, I walked into my first Challenge Success meeting as a parent representative for my daughter’s high school PTA. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but when I walked into the meeting a few minutes late the words I heard from a senior that day still echo in my mind: “Well, I’m not saying I cheat all the time, but I do feel the pressure to get straight A’s.”“We want individual rankings gone. We’re constantly competing, and it’s exhausting.” The topic was cheating—described by a teacher as “very creative and out-of-control cheating issues.” What shocked me wasn’t just the topic—it was the raw honesty from the students. What I Learned About Why Kids Cheat: Kids Know More Than We Think A freshman confidently corrected a teacher who believed younger students weren’t aware of their class rankings.“Yes they are,” he said. “Every kid I know knew their rank from freshman year on.” I sat, wide-eyed, waiting for someone to scold the students. But instead, the adults in the room listened. It was an honest, respectful conversation—the kind I wish happened more often between students and educators. What I Learned About Why Kids Cheat: When Pressure Leads to Desperation The students weren’t admitting to cheating out of laziness or lack of values. They were overwhelmed. Too many tests. Hours of homework. Overwhelming and high expectations. Not enough hours in the day. I’ve heard these same stories in my own classrooms as a health teacher. Students opened up about the weight they carried—the pressure to be perfect in academics, sports, music, volunteering, and social life. Cheating as a Coping Mechanism Cheating today isn’t a fringe behavior. It’s often a response to an impossible standard. Students feel they can’t keep up, so they look for shortcuts. The sad truth? Some parents know. Some don’t approve, but they understand. They see how hard their kids are working and how little breathing room they have. I know of parents who do projects for their kids from elementary school to high school. The Cost of the “Perfect” Transcript The façade of perfection—AP classes, varsity sports, top rankings—comes at a cost. Our kids are trading rest, play, and even ethics just to keep up appearances. The emotional toll is deep, and the long-term consequences are still unfolding. Listening to Students Is the First Step What gave me hope in that meeting—and in every conversation I’ve had since—is the power of student voice. When we give kids a safe place to speak, they rise to the occasion. Most are not asking for handouts. They are likely asking for sanity, for balance, for a system that values who they are over what they achieve. Start the Conversation at Home Want to understand what your child is facing? Ask this one powerful question: “How do you define success?” Then, write down your own definition. Compare the two. This simple exercise—shared with me by Challenge Success—has sparked some of the most meaningful conversations in my home and in my coaching practice. Let’s Rethink Success, Together If you want to dig deeper into this topic, or need support navigating academic pressure in your home, I offer free consult calls for parents. I’m also happy to share the “Define Success” worksheet I use with families. Here is the link to the original blog post I wrote in 2013. Let’s raise kids who are healthy, honest, and whole—not just high-achieving. Need some guidance, schedule a free call here and find out how to move FORWARD with support from parent coaching. Siah S. Fried, MPH, CHES was a parent leader for Challenge Success. She is currently an Intuitive Eating and Positive Body Talk Coach. Find out more at her website: https://siahfriedcoach.com/

How to Break Free from Diet Culture at The Table:
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How to Break Free from Diet Culture at the Table: A Lesson from One Teen’s Recovery Plan

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How a Burger, Shake, and Fries Became a Prescription for Healing How to break free from diet culture at the table: I recently collaborated with a pediatric eating disorder doctor to support a teen client, and the message we worked hard to drive home was clear—and maybe even a little surprising: She needed to eat a burger, shake, and fries at least once a week.Yes, on purpose.Not as a “cheat meal” or a treat after a big game.But as a prescribed part of her healing. How to Break Free from Diet Culture at The Table: More Than Calories- Why All Fat Matters for Menstruating Athletes Because this wasn’t just about calories. It was about restoring her period, rebuilding trust in food, and helping her growing, athletic body get what it truly needed: energy, nourishment, and yes—saturated fat. Most of our lives we are told to avoid saturated fat as an excess intake can lead to heart disease and other diseases and related conditions. However, as with many nutrition messages, recommendations around fat and specifically saturated fat can be misinterpreted, taken to extremes, or ignored. For growing and menstruating female athletes in particular, saturated fat plays a role in supporting hormonal balance and overall health. How to Break Free from Diet Culture at The Table: Why Saturated Fat Has a Place on the Plate In a world that still praises clean eating and fears fat, this recommendation can feel radical. But it’s rooted in solid science and compassionate care. Saturated fat, often painted as the dietary villain, actually aids hormonal health—particularly for teen girls who are highly active or undernourished. It supports estrogen production, which is essential for getting and maintaining a regular period. It’s not something to fear—it’s something to include. For more detailed guidance on dietary fats, refer to this scholarly article or the American Heart Association. Keep in mind, though, that while both provide valuable information, they do not specifically address the unique needs of female athletes recovering from eating disorders. A Wake-Up Call at Home: What I Realized About My Own Kids’ Meals As a parent, I found myself reflecting on my own daughters’ meals. Were they getting all three macronutrients—carbohydrates, protein, and fat—in a balanced way? Was I unintentionally avoiding or limiting certain foods based on outdated nutrition fears or wellness culture messages? This doctor’s words challenged me to take a closer look, and I realized: it’s not just kids in treatment who need this message. All kids—especially teens—need to know that food isn’t good or bad. All foods fit. And so do milkshakes. Clean Eating Culture and the Rise of Food Fear I see it every day in my work with families: teens becoming more rigid, fearful, or selective about food, and parents unsure when it’s just “picky eating” or something more. But when periods disappear, energy plummets, or moods shift, that’s the body waving a red flag. And sometimes the answer isn’t more supplements or stricter rules—it’s more fries. How to Break Free from Diet Culture: A Gentle Reminder to Parents of Teens If you’re raising a teen—especially an active teen—consider this your gentle nudge to take a look at what’s on their plate. Seek support from a doctor or a reputable health provider. Be clear on your concerns and questions. Here are some to consider: It’s Not About Guilt—It’s About Nourishment This isn’t about guilt. It’s about awareness—and giving yourself permission to loosen the rules, challenge food fears, and make space for joyful, satisfying, and deeply nourishing meals. Want more tips on raising intuitive eaters and positive body talk? Sign up for my weekly newsletter here. To find out more about the Move FORWARD parent coaching program specializing in intuitive eating and positive body talk, schedule a free call using this link.

Learn how to teach your child to eat intuitively
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Eat Intuitively: 3 Steps to Teach Your Child How to Eat Intuitively

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🧠 Want your child to have a healthier relationship with food? How to Help Your Child Eat Intuitively:Learning how to help your child eat intuitively is one of the most valuable lifelong gifts you can give. In a world that’s often consumed by diet culture and food rules, intuitive eating is a powerful, yet often overlooked, foundation for lasting health and self-trust.If you’re starting to notice signs that your child may be becoming overly anxious about food, body size, or “eating healthy,” you’re not alone—and you’re not too early. In fact, this is the right time to start paying attention. And one of the most powerful tools we have? Intuitive eating. Teaching your child to eat intuitively isn’t about ignoring nutrition—it’s about building body trust, reducing food anxiety, and laying the foundation for a lifelong healthy relationship with food and self. Here are 3 simple steps to start practicing intuitive eating at home, no matter your child’s age or current habits: How to Help Your Child Eat Intuitively 1️⃣ Ditch the “Good” vs. “Bad” Food Labels 🍪 Food isn’t a moral issue.Labeling foods as “junk,” “bad,” or “clean” might seem harmless—or even helpful—but these words can cause shame, confusion, and secrecy around eating. Instead, aim for the message that “all foods fit.” This doesn’t mean you throw nutrition out the window. It means we remove guilt and fear from the conversation so our kids can learn to make choices based on internal cues, not external judgment. These are key lessons to help your child eat intuitively. 💬 Try saying:“Let’s enjoy a little of everything.”“All foods give us something—energy, joy, satisfaction.” How to Teach Your Child to Eat Intuitively 2️⃣ Trust Their Fullness Cues 🥗 Don’t pressure them to clean their plate.Many of us were taught to override our body’s signals by finishing everything on our plate or taking “just 3 more bites.” But what if we helped our kids tune in instead? Helping your child stay connected to their hunger and fullness cues builds self-trust and lowers the risk of restrictive or binge behaviors later on. 💬 Try saying:“Is your body saying it’s full?”“Only you know when your body is full.” 3️⃣ Focus on How Food Feels 💬 Ask about sensations, not calories.Instead of asking if a food is “healthy” or “bad,” shift the conversation to how food feels in their body. This empowers your child to notice how different foods affect energy, mood, and satisfaction—without fear or shame. 💬 Try saying:“How did that feel in your tummy?”“Did that give you the energy you needed?”“What food would feel good to your body right now?” Final Thoughts: This Is a Starting Point—Not a Perfect System You’re not going to get it right every time. And that’s okay. But these small, intentional shifts in how we talk about food and bodies can make a huge impact over time. If you’re already seeing early signs of food anxiety or body dissatisfaction in your child, intuitive eating is not just helpful—it can be protective. And you don’t have to navigate this alone. ✨ I work with parents who want to catch disordered eating early. I help parents build strong communication at home. Raise kids who feel confident in their bodies and at peace with food. Want support? Book a free 30 minute call with this calendar link. Download my 4 Step Guide: How to talk to your kids about their eating……without making it worse.Sign

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Start with What Matters Most: Focus On Your Family Values

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When a child is struggling with body image, disordered eating, or any physical or mental health challenge, the fear can be overwhelming. As parents, we often go into “fix it” mode—grasping for solutions, protocols, or professional opinions that promise results. But before we dive into action, we need to pause and anchor ourselves in something far more powerful than panic: our family values. First, focus on your family values. That’s why the first step in my Move FORWARD coaching program is Find Your Family Values. Focus on Family Values: Why Values Matter Your family’s core values are the foundation for every decision you make—how you talk to your child, how you set boundaries, how you respond to hard moments, and how you define success. Without them, you’re at the mercy of outside noise: social media, conflicting expert advice, school culture, or fear-driven parenting. But when you’re clear on your values, you parent from a place of purpose instead of pressure. Values give you confidence in your choices—even when they’re different from what other families are doing. They help you model resilience, compassion, and clarity for your child. And they remind you that healing isn’t one-size-fits-all. It’s personal. It’s relational. And it’s deeply rooted in what matters most to you. Focus on Family Values: Reframing Health & Healing In this first phase of the Move FORWARD journey, we work together to redefine what health, connection, and healing look like in your unique family system. That might mean: When you parent from your values, you begin to trust your own inner compass—and that trust is something your child can feel. What This Looks Like Here’s how we do it: This isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about showing up with intention and love—even in the unknown. A Foundation for the Road Ahead Whether your child is just starting to struggle or deep in the healing process, this pillar grounds everything else. It helps you stay steady when things get hard and reminds you why you’re doing the work. You’re not parenting from panic—you’re leading with purpose. And that changes everything. Ready to move FORWARD with confidence and clarity?Learn more or book a discovery call at www.SiahFriedCoach.comLet’s build a foundation your family can stand on—together. Use this link   to sign up for one of the following FREE online workshop:  ONLINE WORKSHOP DATES & TIMES Watchful, Not Worried: Helping Your Child Navigate Body Image, Eating & Mental Health in Times of Transition/Transition to Middle School: May 13:  6:00 PM Online. Ideal for parents of middle schoolers, this workshop will help you understand the red flags, open conversations that feel safe, and build a home that protects your child’s body image before problems begin. Transitioning to High School: Supporting Mental Health, Body Image & Belonging /Transition to High School: May 14: 7:00 PM Online. This one’s for parents of rising high schoolers—helping you support your teen’s sense of self during a major identity-shifting time. Before They Go: How to Support Your College-Bound Teen’s Relationship with Food, Body & Mental Health/Off to College: May 15: 6:30 PM Online. Perfect for parents of graduating seniors. This session covers how to spot early signs of struggle (even from afar), how to stay connected without overstepping, and how to build resilience before they leave.

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How To Help Your Child Navigate Body Image, Eating, and Mental Health

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Help your child navigate body image, eating, and mental health. Every parent wants to give their child the best shot at thriving—emotionally, mentally, and physically. But transitions like starting middle school, high school, or college can be incredibly vulnerable times for kids. They’re facing new environments, social pressures, and changes in their bodies, and for many, this can trigger struggles with body image, disordered eating, or even eating disorders. The numbers speak for themselves:👉 More than 1 in 5 boys and men in the U.S. and Canada meet the criteria for an eating disorder. And those are just the ones we know about. That’s why I’m offering a series of free online workshops for parents—designed to support you in spotting early signs, starting conversations without shame or panic, and building a home environment that helps your child feel confident, supported, and resilient. 🧠 Featured Workshop: Help your child navigate body image eating & mental health Watchful, Not Worried: Helping Your Child Navigate Body Image, Eating, and Mental Health For parents of rising 6th graders📅 May 13, 2025🕕 6:00 PM PT💻 Online & Free This workshop focuses on the middle school transition—a stage that often flies under the radar but is deeply important in shaping lifelong attitudes about food, body, and self-worth. We’ll cover: ✅ How to spot early signs of body image and eating concerns✅ Ways to talk about these sensitive topics with confidence—not fear✅ How to support emotional and physical changes, no matter your child’s gender✅ Tools for creating a connected, resilient, and safe home environment Register here:👉 Click to save your spot 🎓 More Free Workshops Coming Up: Help your child navigate body image eating & mental health These are all moments when kids are especially at risk—and when parents feel unsure of how to help. Let’s change that. Want to Bring a Workshop to Your Community? If you’re part of a school, PTA, or parenting group, I’d love to offer a personalized version of one of these workshops for your community—virtually or in person. 📧 Reach out at siah_fried@yahoo.com to start the conversation. Bonus Resource: 📥 Download your free guide:“4 Steps to Talk to Your Teen About Food… Without Making It Worse” – available at www.SiahFriedCoach.com Let’s support parents so kids can thrive—through every stage of life.

Find out the difference between disordered eating and eating disorders: what parents need to know
parent coaching, parenting, parenting a child with an eating disorder, parenting a child with eating disorder, parenting through body image challenges, parenting through hard times, parenting tips for teen stress, prioritizing what matters, self care, stress

Prioritize What Matters When You’re in Survival Mode as a Parent

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Parenting while in survival mode is tiring. Prioritize what matters: protect your energy, show up authentically, and prioritize self-care.

Here we are: mom and baby. We got through disordered eating and
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When Mother Knows Best: How to Tune into Instinct

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I remember sitting in the doctor’s office with my daughter, my gut tightening with quiet concern. Her eating habits had shifted, and there was new, uncomfortable body talk creeping into our conversations. I was cautious, yes-but not yet scared. Until the nurse noticed her heart rate had dropped significantly since her last visit. Then came the words that changed everything: “Some sort of eating disorder.” Just like that, the world tilted. My breath caught. I’m a clinical health educator. I’ve helped patients in a clinic with eating disorders. At the time I was a teacher who had taught both high school and college students about eating disorders. I’ve supported students through recovery. My extended family is no stranger to these struggles. But this? This was my daughter. And in that moment, I wasn’t a professional—I was a mom, scared and overwhelmed. What followed wasn’t clarity or guidance—it was confusion, defiance, and disconnection. The medical team quickly slotted her into a standard treatment plan: a four-times-a-week program that never quite fit. Every instinct in my body told me it was wrong. She pushed back. Our relationship strained. And still, I kept showing up, trusting the experts—while silently screaming inside that we were on the wrong path. What I didn’t have then was someone to walk with me. Someone who could look me in the eye and say,“You’re not crazy. You’re not overreacting. And yes—there is another way.” So I became that person. For her. And now, for other parents. One thing I’ve noticed with almost every parent I work with—whether their child is struggling with physical health, mental health, or specifically an eating disorder—is the overwhelming mix of emotions they carry. Guilt. Anger. Sadness. Disappointment. I’ve felt them too. One parent said it perfectly: “It’s just not fair that he has to deal with this. He should be able to enjoy his teenage years and be more carefree.”                             She’s right. It isn’t fair. But the truth is, life’s not fair—and when kids face challenges early on and are taught how to cope in healthy ways, they become more resilient and better prepared for life. Every family is carrying something. If it’s not mental or physical health, it might be grief, divorce, discrimination, or another hidden struggle that no one talks about. We’re all taught to put on a game face—especially on social media. That pressure to appear perfect adds to our stress. And we start to feel like we’re failing compared to all the “perfect” families online. Our kids feel it too. Only harder. Their brains aren’t fully developed yet, so they can’t sort through it like we can. With her permission, I shared these thoughts with that client—and she exhaled. Sometimes we just need to hear that we’re not alone. Because authentic parenting doesn’t always look pretty. It doesn’t fit the mold of a filtered Instagram story. But when you lead with honesty, care, and your values—your child feels it. And the hard stuff? That’s what builds character and resilience. That’s what I saw with my own kids. All three of them faced real challenges—and today, they’re stronger for it. My beautiful, brilliant daughter’s experience with disordered eating was one of the hardest seasons of our lives… and it led her down a path where she is now thriving as she works on her PsyD in graduate school many miles away from home. She worked in a residential site with severe young people with eating disorders and I wish I could tell you the difference she’s made in their lives. While she battled this in high school, I knew—deep down—that she would grow through it. But some days, we just had to lean into the frustration and say, “This isn’t fair.” And that’s okay too. That’s why I’m sharing this story in this week’s blog post:“When a Mother’s Instinct Speaks Louder Than Protocol: A Journey Through Eating Disorder Recovery.” It’s personal. It’s raw. And it holds the reminder I wish I had back then:  You’re not failing. You’re doing the hard, beautiful work of showing up. Facing the truth is hard. But avoiding it often costs more. When we show up authentically—even through pain—we create space for true healing. Some parents may accept alcohol or disordered eating as “just part of being a kid,” but for many, these patterns become addictions or lifelong mental health struggles. A real diagnosis might feel harder to face—but it also opens the door to real tools, real healing, and real connection. Choosing honesty and support now gives your child a better chance at long-term wellbeing. They’ll be more prepared for life as an adult—and as you know, it’s not always easy. But with support, they can take on life’s toughest battles and come out stronger.

how to talk to your child about body image: Learn what to say and what to avoid
body, body dysmorphia, body dysmorphia coaching, body image, desired body image, dissatisfied with appearance, distorted body image, food restriction, health coach, healthy eating, parent coach, parent coaching, Uncategorized

How to Talk About Body Image: What to Say and What to Avoid

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How to talk to your child about body image: what to say and what to avoid can be like walking on eggshells. As a parent, watching your child struggle with body image can be heartbreaking. You want to say the right things to help them feel confident and secure, but it’s not always easy to know what those things are. The way we talk about bodies—our own and theirs—has a lasting impact. Small comments, even well-intended ones, can either build their self-esteem or reinforce insecurities. If your child is struggling with body image, here’s a guide on what to say (and what to avoid) to foster a positive and healthy self-view. A Personal Story: When My Child Questioned Their Body I’ll never forget the day my daughter stood in front of the mirror, tugging at her shirt, and asked, “Do I look fat?” She was only nine. My heart sank. I had worked so hard to create a positive environment around food and body image, yet here she was, already questioning her worth based on her appearance. Instead of dismissing her feelings or rushing to reassure her, I took a deep breath and asked, “What makes you ask that?” She told me that some girls at school were talking about their weight after the PE teacher weighed them in class. I was shocked—not only that their weight had been recorded, but that it had become a topic of discussion among a group of nine-year-old girls. At that moment, I realized how important it was to give her the right message—not just once, but over and over again. I told her, “Your body is strong and capable. It lets you run, dance, and play. And no matter what, you are loved exactly as you are.” That conversation sparked many more over the years, and I continue to remind her that her body is hers—not for anyone else to judge. This experience made me even more passionate about helping other parents navigate these moments. If your child is struggling with body image, here are some key things to say (and not say) to help them build a positive self-image. How to Talk to Your Child about Body Image: What to Say 1. “Your body is strong and capable.” Focusing on what the body can do rather than how it looks helps shift the emphasis from appearance to function. Instead of saying, “You look great in that outfit,” try, “Your legs help you run fast, and your arms are strong enough to climb that tree!” 2. “All bodies are different, and that’s a good thing.” Kids naturally compare themselves to others. Reassure them that bodies come in all shapes and sizes and that no one “perfect” body exists. Reinforce that diversity in appearance is normal and valuable. 3. “It’s okay to have tough days, but remember that your worth isn’t based on how you look.” Children (and adults) will have moments of self-doubt. Let them know that it’s normal to feel this way sometimes, but remind them that their value is based on who they are, not their appearance. 4. “Let’s focus on what makes you feel good.” Encourage habits that promote well-being rather than weight or appearance. Instead of saying, “You should eat healthier, ”try, “What foods make your body feel strong and energized?” or “What activities make you feel happy and confident?” 5. “I love you exactly as you are.” The simplest and most powerful statement you can make. Kids need to hear that their worth is not tied to how they look. Reassure them that they are loved unconditionally. How to Talk to Your Child about Body Image: What NOT to Say 1. “I feel so fat” or any negative comments about your own body. Children pick up on how their parents talk about themselves. If you criticize your own body, they may start looking for “flaws” in theirs. Try modeling self-acceptance by speaking kindly about your own appearance. 2. “You don’t need to worry about that” or dismissing their feelings. If your child expresses concern about their body, brushing it off with “You’re fine, don’t worry” can make them feel unheard. Instead, validate their feelings: “I hear that you’re feeling upset about this. Let’s talk about it.” 3. “Maybe you should try eating less/more” or commenting on their food choices. Statements about food can be tricky, even if they come from a place of concern. Instead of directing their eating habits, encourage mindful eating by asking, “How does that food make you feel?” and making nutritious options accessible at home. 4. “You’d look better if you…” Even subtle suggestions about changing appearance can be damaging. Avoid comments like, “That outfit would look better if you lost a little weight” or “Your hair would look nicer if you did this.” Instead, praise their individuality and personal style. 5. “You should exercise so you don’t gain weight.” Exercise should be about joy, strength, and well-being—not punishment. Encourage movement in ways that feel good, like dancing, biking, or playing outside, rather than linking it to weight control. How to Foster a Body-Positive Home Final Thoughts Your words shape how your child sees themselves. By focusing on body positivity, self-worth, and healthy habits, you can help them build confidence and resilience. If you notice ongoing distress about their body image, book a free call with me and we can explore how we can work together. Most importantly, remind your child that they are valued and loved—just as they are. For more information on parent and health coaching check out my website.

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